Alison’s Idol – one year anniversary

I’d been in Mummy’s arms a few hours no more
creeping onto the bed, a huge grin you wore
Elizabeth; my Sister, so gentle and kind
No better idol in my whole life will I find

You soothed my tears, you took my hand
You gave me words, you helped me stand
You shared your world, made it my own
I’m happy with you to call this our home

Then Autumn arrived and everything changed
Where’s Mummy I asked Daddy? The routine re-arranged
Suddenly you’re gone, disappeared from our room
When I see you – no playing – people wish you well soon

You miss my birthday and you miss my cake
It wasn’t as good as one mummy would make
I wasn’t as happy as I had hoped to be
something was missing inside of me

You’re crying and moaning, you’re staying in bed
Those bags of juice are hurting your head
You’re not my Beth; you’re grumpy and sad
Wires and people are making you mad

Our whole life is different, more focused on you
Does Mummy even notice the things that I do?
Daddy is still there trying to make me smile
But driving away I feel every mile.

I want my sister, my mummy, how things were before
A few hours with you both but I just want more
Then Ronald Mcdonald gave us a room
just cross the road, I will see you soon

Suddenly my sister isn’t my sister after all
with no hair on her head its shiny like a ball
I don’t want a brother I scream and I run
I just want my sister to come play in the sun.

I start going to your school but your not there
everyone talking to daddy showing they care
the school is fantastic there are friends here for me
its a welcome distraction from all that i see.

You finally come home too weak to walk
a green frame you use and you don’t like to talk
a tube in your nose, a wiggle under your arm
what have they been doing to cause you such harm

You don’t come to school, you don’t like to eat
You won’t play with me, you just sit in your seat
They have broken my sister she no fun anymore
I wave to you sadly as I go out the door.

Why are you small? I’m almost your size
When we run I can catch you to my surprise
You’re fed lots of medicines to which you protest
Well pass it to me, I’ll have the rest!

The time ticks on by and things start to come right
Wiggle has gone with just a kiss left in sight
We play in the bath and splash with the water
Mummy smiles as she watches her eldest daughter

I know she remembers the things she has seen
how thin and how sick you really had been
Your fatter and faster you can now catch me
You run and you jump, you eat all your tea.

Elizabeth my idol I love you even more
your bigger and better than you ever were before
Your stronger and tougher than anyone I know
You’ve been through so much but it still doesn’t show.

The thermometer in your ear, just wait for the beep
The panic begins when you’re torn from your sleep
Too hot for our house, I hear your moan
Why can’t everyone just leave you alone?

More days in hospital, all scattered with toys
I see other bald heads amongst the girls and the boys
You head for the room where they make you cry
They stab you with pins, I’ll never know why

Th sun has been shining its been a year
since that fateful day when you were no longer near
A summer of fun, and back to school now
just look at your hair people exclaim “WOW”

You look so much better, your happy and proud
You scream and you laugh ever so loud
You told me your secret, I saw the scars on your chest
You’ve been kissed by a wiggle and now you’re simply the best